Friday, January 29, 2010

Bed and Breakfast
This year for Christmas Bryce's parents gave us a free night's stay at the Anniversary Inn, in Salt Lake. This is the only picture I took of our room:
But if you are super curious you can look on their web site. They have a ton of fun rooms, (literally 2000 lbs worth!*) The room was really pretty and they give you cheesecake at night and breakfast in the morning!

The best part was spending time on a mini-adventure with Bryce. I am so lucky to have such a fantastic husband! You might think this is going to get mushy, but you are wrong, because that mushy stuff is none of your business! (Unless you, the reader, are Bryce; in which case I will tell you later!) Thanks Mom and Dad McEwen for the wonderful present, and the excellent job you did raising your son.

*Not actually 2000 lbs, which means that when I said "literally" I actually meant "figuratively". This happens more than you would suspect.

Thursday, January 28, 2010

Sister Mind Bond Activate!
After my victorious appearance in court I needed to celebrate. I considered a fireworks display, unfortunately in Utah county that is a class B misdemeanor punishable by a $1,000 fine and/or 6 months in jail. Foiled! So I came up with a new celebratory plan:Gold shoes! Just as shiny as fireworks, but with 98% less chance of jail time!

I ordered them on the internet and excitedly thought about the shiny package coming to me in the mail. One week later I read this entry on my sister Clairice's blog! I know what you are thinking: "What in the what?!?"

I know it! It's crazy! Who the heck buys gold shoes? And how in the heck do two sisters buy the almost same pair of gold shoes on the same day, in different states, neither one knowing what the other is doing? MADNESS! Shiny shiny madness...

Friday, January 22, 2010

To the Management

I am writing, in behalf of the entire digestive system, regarding a rather large amount of "No-Bake Cookies" received this morning, and a batch of week-old enchiladas yesterday.

We are frustrated that this continues to be a problem, despite earlier complaints, such as the lemon bar and the vinegar incidents. Please be advised that if work conditions do not improve we will be forced to take action, again.

Sincerely,
Angry Tummy

Friday, January 15, 2010

Little Garden in a Light BulbI recently stumbled across this tutorial on how to hollow out a light bulb. Of course I was itching to try it! Team Droid explains the process very well, I did two in about 10 minutes. Now I have a little light bulb terrarium on my desk at work! I put a succulent plant in it (definitely the hardest part) I plan on planting seeds in the other light bulb.

In case you are interested, his name is Clancy.

Thursday, January 14, 2010

Tuesday, January 12, 2010

Christmas Pajamas
Every year, since I can remember, we open a present on Christmas Eve. My mom always chooses the present for us, and it is always jammies. This is something my mom suffers a lot of whining over. (I still say that year when I got the XXL hairy-dog-with-a-basket-of-apples-jammies was whine worthy.) I have to say though, this year's PJ present was a fabulous success. These are actually the best pajamas I have ever had! They are comfy and the perfect length and very pink. So good job Mom! And also I love you! (But not just because you picked out some cute jammies this year.)P.S.
In this picture I was reading "Diary of a Wimpy Kid", which was a present, from Bryce and me, to my brother Nate; which I stole about 2 minutes after he opened it. It was hilarious and I recommend it for anyone who needs a brain rest.

Thursday, January 07, 2010

Rachel-2, The Man-0
Or, Rachel Beats a Traffic Ticket

Some of you may have heard about my school zone speeding ticket, (26 in a 20 zone!!!). I was pretty annoyed about it so I fought it in court today. My argument was that the lights that alert drivers of a school zone were obscured by a tree. This is a courtroom artist's rendition of my hearing:

(Just kidding it is a picture I drew after the trial, note my cute "going to court pants".) I was a little nervous because the police man had a lawyer, and I didn't. The two of them seemed to be friends and I heard one of them scoff, "Oh, this should be hard" as they were going over the case together. I had three secret weapons though:

1. Over 14 hours of "Perry Mason" viewing
2. Mock-trial experience in 8th grade
3. Photo evidence

Observe:
Exhibit A
Exhibit B:
Turns out that the first two weapons are really only useful for murder cases, which I have not been convicted of lately, so I mostly relied on my third secret weapon in this case.

First I had to wait in the courtroom for a long time. Then they brought in three inmates. (One of them was wearing a black and white striped jumper thing, JUST LIKE ON SPONGEBOB!) Then the judge came in and everybody stood up, then we all sat down and they called my name.

The policeman, in full police garb, took the stand, and the lawyer asked him several questions about his training and the maintenance of his radar-gun. (I did a Google search on "how to fight a speeding ticket" and this was something they suggest that you attack, in case the police man was ever remiss in his equipment checks.) Google would have been foiled in this court because officer The Man had impeccable radar habits. He did not have impeccable foiling Rachel's plan habits though, because he gave his account, of the afternoon he gave me my ticket, by saying, "I don't really remember much about it, I gave out a lot of tickets that day. I think she said she saw the lights."

The judge asked me if I had any questions for the witness. I actually had a few, but it didn't seem useful to ask them after he just said he couldn't really remember anything besides that I was speeding.

Then it was my turn. I stood at a tiny little podium and told the judge that the lights were obscured by trees and the only way that I would see them is if I had been really really looking for them. I also said that's probably why the officer gave so many tickets that day. Then I showed the prosecution lawyer my pictures and gave them to the clerk to show to the judge.

Next came closing remarks. The prosecution lawyer made a closing statement saying I should be found guilty anyway because I had never denied speeding. I know it's just his job, but I was kind of offended that he would say something like that when I just showed him my pictures, wasn't he paying attention???

For my closing remarks I said that I didn't have any reason to think there were any special traffic rules being enforced at that time, and that it is not fair to expect drivers to hunt for lights in trees instead of being aware of pedestrians on the sidewalk as you are normally instructed to do.

The judge said "Even though Ms. McEwen did not deny speeding I know reasonable doubt when I see it and it is here, she did not have proper notification, case dismissed."

I said "Thank you, your Honor" because that's what Perry says. Then I left the court-room and told the metal detector guy that I won, (since he is the only city employee person at the courthouse who didn't treat me like some kind of menace to society.)