Friday, July 01, 2011

Help Me Internet!

Update: This mystery has been solved. You are supposed to cut them in half. Two popsicles for the price of one!

Have you tried Tampico? It comes in a gallon jug, like milk, except it is juice, except it is not juice because it contains less than 1% real juice, so it's more like a chemical-sugar mixture of deliciousness. Handsome Bryce and I would buy it from time to time as a secret vice. We were starting to get pretty hooked on it when Wal*Mart yanked it from their shelves, and we have been having withdrawals ever since.

Then frabjous day! I discovered that they now sell Tampico freezer pops, thus allowing me to combine my unholy Tampico addiction with my irrepressible need for popsicles!
As you can see, the package says "Irresistible". It's true guys. It is so true, but this is where things get dicey.
These are not like Otter Pops. They are encased in some kind of flexible plastic pod with a strange crimped top.
We tried snipping off the weird top. It produced a few tantalizing drops of Tampico ambrosia but no more! We tried contorting the plastic in every direction, but in the end we were reduced to gnawing on them like dogs.Please, internet, tell me there is another way, an easier way, to eat these magical ice pops! I need them!

4 comments:

Sonya said...

Ewwwww. I always thought that stuff looked terrible and gross. Milky orangey-flavoured stuff poured into an old milk jug? What does it taste like?

McRachie said...

#1 You only think it's milky because it comes in milk bottles.

#2 It tastes like distilled rainbows wrapped in the sound of a butterfly's wings.

Sonya said...

Rainbows are pretty wishy-washy anyway, and the sound of a butterfly is pretty much the same as the sound of any other horrible flying insect that might end up pinned in some freaky person's glass box.
In other words, you can keep your nasty tampon-juice. I'll stick to my green smoothies.

McRachie said...

Rainbows are wishy washy? Butterflies are horrible? Clearly green smoothies deaden your soul.